I'll Go, I'll Say, I'll Be What You Want Me To Be

Elder Heath, Elder Richard Gautavai - Wausau ZL - On Wisconsin!

Periodic check-in of the elder's cousin, Elder Richard Gautavai who is currently serving as a Zone leader in the Wisconsin Milwaukee mission. Elder Gautavai entered the mission January 2012.

Good morning, good morning!

We here in Wisconsin Rapids were very impressed with this past weekend of General Conference. I felt the Lord's voice in many of His servants, and I felt his call to do more, to become more, and to lengthen our strides. This past conference answered numerous amounts of questions for me here in the field, and my faith has increased. I left General Conference with a clear understanding of part of the Lord's vision for me.

I want to thank you for what you said before I came into the field (I will address this later). As you know, I was strongly impressed a couple of weeks ago that I wanted to return home on January 3rd. I was so sure. But after much asking, seeking, and knocking, I decided that January 30th was when I should return home.

Upon calling President Cutler and informing him that I would not be returning home for school, I was immediately racked with thoughts of torment and regret. I had never before been plagued by so much doubt and confusion. For the next couple of days I felt that I was making the wrong decision, and that everything was wrong. I was then attacked again to finish my mission casually, and even worse, as disobedient as I could. As I felt these feelings, my faith began to grow. I knew that the Lord loved me, and I knew that He is not the author of confusion, and He began to speak peace to my soul.

I will share with you the thoughts that I left with Rylee concerning my decision to labor in the field.

Yes, I have decided to come home on January 30th. I actually changed my decision, but I have received a confirmation from the Lord that January 30th is an acceptable time for me to return home. I will share with you 2 things that helped me to make this decision:

1 - President Cutler, lovingly, suggested that the First Presidency had full intentions on every missionary, regardless of schooling, should serve for the intended 2 years. I felt a deep impression that this is exactly what the Lord would have for all of his children, and that demonstrating faith in the Lord's commands always brings increased testimony.

2 - Elder Perkins, a Seventy in the church, came to our mission and taught us that one way that missionaries can model their lives is after that of the mission president's and his wife's. I was touched deeply by this statement as both President Jones and President Cutler have moved me to exercise greater faith than I ever have before. I thought back to a letter that President Cutler had written me where he talked about how he had postponed his early arrival for school to labor in the field. I see how this small sacrifice has brought him to a greater and deeper understanding of the Atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ, and it touched my heart that this is a path worthy of following.

While there have been other things that have influenced my decision to stay in Wisconsin for the additional 3 weeks or so, your father's voice has also rung through my mind. Right before I went into the MTC he told me that, "nothing is more important here at home than the things you will do for the next 2 years."

I testify that serving a full-time mission is a commandment from the Lord Jesus Christ. Just as obeying the Word of Wisdom and going to church each Sunday is a commandment, serving a full 2 year mission is the same. President Monson has said, "that every worthy, able young man should prepare to serve a mission. Missionary service is a priesthood duty, an obligation the Lord expects of us who have been given so very much."

I would encourage you to share this wonderful knowledge with those of your friends who may struggle with the choice to serve a mission. It is a commandment of God, and it has changed my life forever. The Lord himself declared this in the Doctrine and Covenants saying, "And now, behold, I say unto you, that the thing which will be of the most worth unto you will be to declare repentance unto this people, that you may bring souls unto me, that you may rest with them in the kingdom of my Father. Amen."

I can't help but say thank you for reminding me more than 20 months ago that there is nothing more important than serving God, and putting God first. I now know that Satan is doing all that he can to thwart the work of our Father in Heaven and deep inside individuals as well.

I have felt the song of redeeming love, and am grateful for this wonderful work that we are blessed to engage in. I love this Gospel, I love this church, and I love the Lord Jesus Christ. It is my prayer that we may all find safety as we lose ourselves in the service of the Lord.

Love you guys!

Elder Gautavai